Posts in Freedom
Let The Things You Didn't Plan Unleash You

Several weeks ago while on our way to get ice cream, my daughter and I found ourselves slam-dunk in the middle of a very long traffic jam.  There was little or no movement and no way of knowing how long we’d be there. 

When we set out on our journey, I hadn’t planned on idling for two hours on the freeway en-route to ice-creamy deliciousness that was just-a-short-distance away.  Neither did I plan on Franki (my daughter) having to pee during this extended standstill.  What to do?  

No toilet in sight.  No movement forward.  No way to pull off the side of the road.

This little event was not planned…..

 

I didn’t plan on my mother leaving when I was a young child.

I didn’t plan on divorcing my husband of 15 years, moving to another country and ending up in Pennsylvania.  

I didn’t plan on getting pregnant, having a child, or having a girl.  (I really thought I'd be more suited to having a boy). 

I didn't plan on have an emergency c-section (I had a home birth planned)!

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Perspective. Perception. Interpretation.

It’s a beautiful morning.  The sun isn’t up yet, but I’m seeing in my mind’s eye what the landscape looks like because I’ve driven this road often.  I know that the leaves are brilliant hues green lifting up overhead as I get closer to the mountainside.  The view is breathtaking in the daylight, even though I can't see it right now.  I feel alive and in-tune.  I’m rockin' out to some tunes as I drive with my thoughts and loving how the other drivers on the road are responsive and moving out of my path in perfect time.  I’m really enjoying the thrill of driving a little faster this morning.  

In front of me, my husband and daughter, and behind me someone else is following - all of us on our way to the same destination.  I’m eager, excited, content, and I’m enjoying this motorcade very much.

Upon our arrival, my perspective is intact.  This was fun!   As we all got out of our respective vehicles, the person who’d been following us exclaimed, “That drive was horrendous!”

Same drive.  Same flow of traffic.  Same road.  Same scenery.  Same houses.  

Very different perceived realities.

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Can You Dare?

Many of us forego good for great; awesome for roarsome; magnificent for phenomenal; outstanding for astonishing.

When I was thinking about leaving my first husband, I feared that I was being stupid.  I doubted that I could do it and I didn't know if I should.  I didn't know where I was going, let alone the steps to take toward what I wanted.  I feared I was leaving a man and a relationship that were really great and would possibly never realize the more that I was reaching for. 

I had stability and a thriving business with my husband.  We had an exquisite home that was often the hub of gatherings for our friends and family.  We traveled frequently and money was ours to spend freely.  We got along, had fun together and respected each other; I loved this man.

So why would I want to leave when I had it so good?  It didn't make sense to me.

There was nothing fundamentally wrong with our relationship and nothing that I could say was a "deal breaker".  

There was nothing I can say that I needed to run away from. 

But I did feel a sense that I wanted to run toward something more. 

Did I dare want more than what I had? (I made myself wrong for wanting more for a long time).

Did I dare go from really good to roarsome?

Was this even possible???

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You're Right Where You're Supposed to Be

To the guy who thinks he just delivers medical prescriptions to homes...you're saving people's lives.

To the gal who thinks she's just a waitress at the local diner...you're making someone's day with your smile.  

To the young lady who thinks she should have taken violin lessons when she was a little girl...you didn't want to do it anyway.  

To the local garbage pickup guy who thinks he's not good enough to do anything else... you're helping beautify someone's place.

To the hair stylist who thinks she's just doing hair...you're promoting self-love.

To the factory worker who thinks he's just pushing buttons...you're helping build something that's going to benefit a lot of people.

To the dedicated mom who takes her kids to school every day and thinks she should be doing something more important than that...

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Be Here, NOW

Can you be right where you are?  

Not trying to grow your list or get more likes and followers.

Not trying to make anything happen, or make someone hear, understand, respect or regard you.

Not trying to make your kids do something other than what they're doing or listen to you when they're not.  

Not trying to be thinner than you are now and not trying to figure out what's coming next.  

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In Pursuit of Perfection?

There's this thing that we do...its called the need for perfection. 

We refrain from putting up a website until we have all the copy, the photos and the impeccable message we want to convey, just so.

We refrain from trying something new or different because we might stink at it.

We don't write because our writing may not be as good as it can be.  Or, it may actually suck.

We reach for the outcomes we want and want them now; if they don't come really-fast-soon, we assume we're doing something wrong.  

We look at our bank account, our status, our likes, our accomplishments, our accolades, and our placement demeaning our sense of worth and value as we draw conclusions about our current position. 

We look at our partner or the wanta-be-potential partner and search for faults and evidence of imperfection - needing him or her to be only-a-little, or quite-a-lot different - right now. 

We judge, categorize, pigeon-hole, criticize, and evaluate based on some illusion of perfection.

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Playing Your Position in The Game of Life - Part 1

We're all in this game that we call life.

Sometimes it feels like a game gone-right, and sometimes it might feel like a joke-gone-horribly-wrong.  

Either way, you're playing your position.  

You're the player - which means you're the perceiver, you're the thinker, you're the feeler, you're the receiver and you're the reactor. 

All of that affects how you play the game, how you approach the game, what you get out of the game, and how the game plays out for you.  

No matter what game you're involved in, there are some game plays that'll help you play your position with a winning attitude.  

I started this list and it got so long that I decided to present it in two parts.  Part 2 will be featured next week. 

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Never Mind the Bucket List. Make a F*ck It List

You may have one of those lists full of things that you want to be, do, lick, have, sniff, squeeze, see, play-with, drive, live-in, and possess that you've thrown into a bucket.  Said list represents things you want to experience before you stop breathing for good.

I'm all for a good Bucket List if that fancies your tickle.  I want you to do all of the things that your heart desires in this lifetime and beyond, so I've created a F*ck It List that just may help you while on your way to fulfilling that Bucket List.  

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