You want a way to control what's going on around you so that it doesn't feel so random and unpredictable.
You want consistency from the one you're with.
You want to know what's going to happen in a future that hasn't happened yet.
Not in a boring kind-of-way that means you have to plan every last-thing right down to the details of what you're going to eat for lunch next Tuesday at 11:53:42 am, ET. Nawwww...not in that way. ;)
But you do want to be prepared. You want to know. You want a sense of control over your life.
Maybe you feel it's all out-of-control.
Maybe controlling as many and as much as you can would make you feel better.
But you've tried that. It didn't work. Mostly...
The control you're seeking is an inside job.
It isn't about controlling the people around you and making them a wee-bit or a-lot different than they are (although sometimes that would be nice, wouldn't it)?
It isn't about scheming to get your way (although getting your way is nice too).
It isn't about controlling the conditions or the circumstances in close or far proximity to you either.
Somewhere-deep-inside-of-you, you know that's not the control you want.
What you sincerely want is to gain control of how you feel.
What you genuinely want is to feel in control of your inner world.
What you honestly want is to feel good.
At the heart of anything you want to seek control of is a belief that controlling it would help you feel better.
Without knowing that you can have emotional control, you feel reactive to the people and things going on around you. It's their fault that you feel as you do.
Emotional control - not to be mistaken for only allowing yourself to feel certain ways. Control in the sense that you know you can manage - you know you're the only one in control of how you feel.
No one else has the ability to feel for you. You can choose what you focus on. You can choose your perspective of your world and the people and events around you. You're the one who thinks your thoughts.
You do have the control you're seeking.
You've just got to care more about how you feel than trying to control anything or anyone around you.
You've just got to care more about feeling good now and thinking about something that feels good to you - rather than looking at, discussing, or thinking about that thing that doesn't feel good to you.
You've got to care to direct your attention and focus on things that feel better - or in ways that feel better.
When you do, and you do it consistently, you'll notice that you feel more in control.
You'll notice that the Universe - your world - responds to you in different ways.
You'll realize by caring about how you feel and managing your focus based on how it feels, your world improves and you have control over the most important and only thing you'll ever have control of...
Your perspective and how you feel.
That's where it all starts.