So life's got you funked up, does it?
You need to lose some, a little or alot of weight; you work too much, or maybe not enough because you need more cash than what you've got; the people at work are negative-ninnies and they're just up to no-good; you want to venture into something new but you're riddled with doubt, fear or something in-between; you don't feel good about yourself and you've lost your zippety-doo-da; your kid is misbehavin'; your significant other is too; the government is in shambles, the weather sucks - it's raining again, or snowing when it's not supposed to be, or it too darn hot; your not-soon-enough-ex is causing you strife over the assets, the kids and taking his sweet time to get this thing done; your boyfriend keeps talking to his ex and now you're wondering what you've gotten yourself into.
It just seems like you're in some sort of shitty cycle or crappy cosmic joke that you don't think is funny - at all - and you're in a funked-up mess.
Come on over. Have a seat beside me. Let's chat...
I'm not going to say you should appreciate your job, your friend, your dog, your ex, the roof over your head or the food on the table; that would be offensive to your senses. I know you want to feel better and I know that right now you feel like you're in a funk that you can't seem to get out-of and that's totally alright. How you feel is how you feel and how you feel is also your reaction to what you're living/observing/noticing.
So...let's talk about the zoo. What's your favorite animal at the zoo? Do you like any other animals at the zoo? What do you like about them?
Where's your favorite place to be (in your mind or physically)? Tell me about it...what's it like? Oh...I want to go there too you make it sound so amazing!
What's your favorite thing to do in the summer? That sounds like fun! What about in the winter, spring and fall?
Do you have pets? "Dogs", you say? Oh, tell me about them! I bet you're a good doggie mommy or daddy.
What are you interested in? That does sound interesting. I want to hear more...
Are you reading any books? Which one(s)? Which parts are drawing you in? What do you like about the story, the plot, the characters or what you're discovering and learning?
What about tv shows...which ones are you into? I lOve that one too...it's so great!
Do you have kids, pets, friends, someone you're in a relationship with that's easy to love? What do they do that make you laugh? What do you love or appreciate about them?
What do you like/enjoy thinking about?
...How do you feel now? Do you feel better? Did you take your time answering the questions and enjoy the conversation?
Did you think we were going to talk about the things that have you funked-up?
Do you think that would have made you feel worse or better?
Did you feel like you were in a funk when we were chatting about all of those other things?
Were you able to forget about it for a little bit?
To get out of a funk that you can't seem to get yourself out-of - you've got to start someplace else. You've got to distract yourself from whatever you believe has got you in it. If you keep noticing (putting your attention on) those things you'll keep feeling trapped in-the-funk.
That makes sense, doesn't it? It's kind-of-like - you don't get out of a hole any-time-soon by going deeper into the hole. To get out of it, you point yourself in a different direction.
There's nothing wrong or faulty with you for feeling the way you're feeling. Your perspective is causing you to feel as you do and most everyone someplace on the planet has felt this way before or is feeling like this now. It's ok.
When you find yourself starting to think of the funk you're in (or the things that make you feel like you're in the funk), can you take a deep breath and get an image in your mind of your friend, your dog, or a comfortable place that you enjoy being?
Can you let those people at work or in your home and how they're behaving take less of your attention for now? Can you remind yourself that it's not your job to control them? Is there someone you *do* like at work, at home or on your planet? Anyone?
Is there something that's going well, better, or easier in your life?
Can you distract yourself from what's got you in your funk and talk and think about other things like we did when we had our chat (above)? Can you have different conversations with yourself and others for awhile?
What can you put your attention on that feels better than those other funky things - those things that have you feeling bad, stressed, duped, etc.?
*That's* how you get out of a funk...a little bit at a time...just a little bit at a time with small choices along the way about what feels better to think and talk about right now.
It'll feel hard at first - to get your attention on-to something else.
What's got you funked-up has had your devotion for awhile.
It'll feel like it's got a grip on you like that love you had when you were a teenager...but keep giving it a try.
The things that bother you can subside, but it doesn't happen with you putting more attention on them. The way you do it is by putting your attention on other things as often and as much as you can. It's not much different from when you want to form a new habit - you substitute one for the other and soon enough, you have a new chosen habit instead.
Keep choosing. I know you can do it.